Am I A Mom?

This sitting job has got to go. Its only been a week but already I am dreading going back on Monday. It's not the kids, they are good kids, but its me. What was I thinking when I told this lady I would watch her kids almost 10 hours a day 5 days a week?! Was I crazy? Did I not think? I think that the answer to both of those questions is yes. I didn't think about it. When I called her I was under the impression that she only wanted some one on Tuesday and Thursday for her 4 month old, but then she told me her Mon, Wed, and Fri person backed out, and could I do it those days too. Ok here's the place that I should have thought, but instead I felt bad for her and thought since I didn't have much else to do I could. Wrong idea Stephanie. Ok, for those of you who are thinking I hate kids, I don't, I just am not ready to be a mom, and that's what I feel like, being in one place for 10 hours a day taking care of a baby and sometimes a 4 year old. This is not a job for me. And its better for the kids too that I stop cause they don't need someone like me keeping them. So on Monday Im going to tell her that I can only do this for 3 more weeks. Although this week it should be better cause the mom has a class that is only until 2 I think, so she should be home by 3, so I guess that isn't so bad. We will see. I think God is trying to be me be more patience. Thanks God. So I am still going to need a job in the mean time. So I went to the mall and put in a few application at some stores since I have a lot of retail experience and also I really liked it. So hopefully one of those will work out. I also think it would be so neat to go work somewhere out west for awhile, somewhere in Colorado or Montana. Oh and I also saw a really neat job today as a tour leader for a company that take international tourists on cross county camping trips. How great would that be? I think that would be something that I would love to do. There are so many things that I think would be great to do, so I am just doing some praying and seeking what God thinks would be the greatest thing for me to do.